Just Call Me Cordelia Wallace

Cordelia: Sons and daughters of the internet, I am Cordelia!

Peanut Gallery: Cordelia is a made up character in a book!

Cordelia: Yes, that much is true. In real life, Cordelia is a sassy office manager who kills Diet Cokes by the hundreds, and has been known to quell a man twice her size with nothing more than a frosty glare and a ten-page memo. When she’s not at work, Cordelia is a sharp-tongued spitfire who chases adventure and takes orders from no man. I AM Cordelia. And I see a whole handful of fellow office workers who troll the webiverse in defiance of this very same 9-5 tyranny. Like me, you have logged on to declare yourselves free, because free is what you are. What would you do without freedom, or twitter, or facebook? What would you do without the freedom to escape reality, to star and RT and poke at will? Will you fight for your right to play scrabble with online enemies?

Naysayers: Fight? For facebook? No, we will work tirelessly; and we will live.

Cordelia: Aye, work and you may die of boredom. Work and you’ll live — at least in a manner of speaking. And when you die in your beds many years from now, or on your toilet while reading a magazine, would you be willing to trade all the days of mindless plodding for one chance, just one chance to come back here and tell our bosses that they may take our lives, but they’ll never take our social medias!!!